星期六, 7月 15, 2006
.害怕.
thursdayi had this dream bout years later he went to my kondo when my parents r away for sumthing. we chatted bout stuff then..we went out to his house. i fell asleep there.
then..when he drived my home, we bumped into my parents. then there goes all the intro n stuff. my parents din hav any bad impression. i wuz worry anyway.
but it went ok. my parents din question bout him after that intro n asking. after that my parents left me back in m'sia for business purposes n cuz i wuz big enuff to b independent
n i hav a bf so that's k. but 2 days later he called me.
'i think ur parents oso wun accept me lerr'
i wuz thinking...wait! not yet...i dun wanna lose u d...we've been going out for years n ur saying give up?
but i went 'no' then i started sobbing. 'no..' inside my heart wuz pounding. i had this very great fear. i wuz so scared. i wuz crying like uncontrolable.
he said..wat? 'i'm sori, honey'
i juz dunno wat to say i juz cried. 'dun..'
then after that he juz paused. i hang up. then suddenly i heard voices telling me 'dun worrie it wuz juz a dream, we r still together'
the days afterreceived 2 sms-es from him. he had to work extra time lorhx. so he din on9. i used up all my credits sms-ing wif him. i miss him like hell. but i had this feeling he is juz fooling me.
i dunno wat's true i'm confused n scared. i really miss him. i think if he wun go on9 anymore, we might juz lose contact n forget about each other. not tat he would remember me, soon, we'll juz fade like memories...i wish time would juz pass faster, i wanna grow older then i can return to m'sia n be by him, like this i dun hav to worry myself like i do now.
i wan to b in his world n help him away from stress. i can't wait to b back in msia. i wish he dun hav to b so apart from me. like everything..age, location n world. i wish he is here. i think he really is fooling me...i hav this great fear he is. ever since i had this dream bout him, i thought back n think maybe he is.
th0ught 0f y0u...
7:40 下午